Is there an event from your childhood that has left you feeling hurt, fearful or alone? Does it make you sad? Or make you feel insecure, angry or frustrated? There are ways to deal with this, and by nurturing your inner child and facing the pain and trauma fully, you can resolve any inner turmoil and conflict to find peace. I learned this first hand recently in an energetic healing session.
Some background …
My parents migrated to Australia from Italy. My mum arrived at the age of four and she could speak both English and Italian. My father however, landed on our shores at the age of 19, not knowing a single word of English. Although I was born in Australia, my parents always chose to speak Italian at home – the dialect from their region to be precise. So, at the age of five, my English was quite limited.
When I started kindergarten all I could say in English was – ‘Hi my name is Romina’ and ‘may I go to the toilet please?‘. This left me feeling silly, isolated, lonely and different from everyone else in my class. I remember a distinct feeling of abandonment. This feeling of not belonging, being different and not knowing enough is a feeling that I’ve carried with me my entire life.
I really acknowledged this, in that healing session. Out of nowhere, I was transported back to the primary school gates. I was six years old and Dad was dropping me off. It was only my first month in kindergarten. I was still scared and I didn’t want to be there. My dad was also nervous. He didn’t want to leave me. I could feel him getting emotional as we approached the school gates.
During my healing session, as I was processing this event, I felt an intense pain, a deep ache. It was not at all freeing, until I went right into the pain and trauma of it. There was hesitation – I really didn’t want to go there. It felt far too great a pain to deal with in this human body. But I did. And it was absolutely worth it!
Afterwards, I felt so liberated. It was such a relief to acknowledge this and give myself a break from the constant berating that ‘I’m not good enough’. Knowing where it was stemming from gave me the freedom and the ability to release it, if I chose!
I now keep a framed picture from this time on my bookshelf, as a reminder to always nurture this little child, who once felt so alone and separate from everyone. It serves as a reminder to constantly tend to her with gentleness, love and care. It reminds me to be playful, to have fun and to remember she is smart enough and she is never, ever alone. I now know that I will always have her back.